At last!

This picture says a lot about how I feel right now. Relief, excitement, and like we are actually moving along now. Less start-stop, jerking momentum like the two weeks struggling to figure out what Sitara was going to be doing. Actually, this is the second day at school, since she wouldn't let me take a picture the first day. Not in front of the school anyway. So here she is, all excited and pumped up about returning to school, playing with her friends, and learning math, English, and listening to stories. Religion, history and social studies are all in Maltese, so she gets good exposure to the language, while dissipating my nerves regarding the Catholic school part. Now with regard to Catholic school and religion, I am not opposed to Catholicism, and I had considered putting Sitara in Catholic schools before because of the generally good academics, but without knowing how the curriculum goes or how strict they would be regarding parish attendance (the website required local children to be baptized). They aren't charging me tuition, but I will be giving them some donation soon since they were nice enough to take her in when no one else would.
 Sitara loves her new school, and she gets to sit next to two girls who speak English well. Most kids can understand English, but only a few can speak it well. The uniforms are very cute and simple, and they are made to last a couple years (you sew in the hems so that they can be let down as she grows). They are fairly inexpensive, as I purchased one set of everything for under 200 euro (1 summer dress, 1 summer PE outfit, 1 pair winter PE sweats, one V-neck sweater, button down shirt, tie, slacks, blazer for winter), socks and shoes. And since the kids only wear them at school (they change when they get home), they don't need to be washed as much. Given, the play yard doesn't have grass or mud to contend with, so my experience is a bit skewed.
 The "finally" feeling has also come to several other aspects of our life here on Malta. Since it is a tourist haven during the summer, many locals are over polite or ignore you, so getting to know my neighbors in Qbajjar Bay took some time. Since Sitara has begun school, I have also been able to take a few moments to myself to focus on enjoying the town of Victoria and the people again instead of fretting so much. The internship is becoming more varied and full of potential. I have begun the application process for four universities, and am nearly done updating my CV. I have received feedback and updates on my readership for my other blog site at www.reachtheworld.org, giving me more push to get the site working for me better. I am becoming more comfortable in the culture, excited about the opportunities, and pondering when or how we will return again. But that can be worried about later. For now, I just need to get into grad school.

Discovering Our New Home

Its been great here since we arrived a week ago, and interesting getting everything in order.  While I expected things to be different, it has been somewhat frustrating with the schools, and getting Sitara enrolled. To begin, the paperwork is approved on the main island, and not at the Education Office here on Gozo. Secondly, they required a notarized letter from her father that I didn't know about until Tuesday. Luckily her father was on top of it and got me the letter Friday. The original plan was to get it all submitted, but the Visa page from our passports was not copied as it should have when we were there Tuesday morning, and so the application that should have been submitted that day has yet to be submitted until Monday morning when I can bring the passports back down again. Work starts the same day, so Sitara will be accompanying me to work and may get a birthday gift sooner than expected to occupy her time.
But alas life goes on, se la vie, and so forth. For all my preparation to get here, so much is being tripped over now we are here as well. It should all work out though. Everyone has been very sweet, and Sitara has made a new friend even! The daughter of the apartment owners is about the same age, and they have been playing non-stop since Friday afternoon. That has given me some time to try to sort things out, and time to chill myself out as well. Since there is a distinct lack of good coffee in the grocers, I have been drinking far too much tea with honey and milk. Evenings are for the instant Vanilla Lattes with a good shot of locally made almond liqueur. I think by now most of my calories are liquid.
Realizing how much I do cook Thai and Japanese food, I am noticing a distinct lack of such foods here, and since my other main staple recipes are Italian--let's just say we've been eating a lot of pasta. And I still have yet to figure out how to light the oven. Lots of European style bread though, very cheap, makes lots of toast and jam or butter. Or cheese. Fresh produce is all over, but it is in carts that are only around in the towns until about noon, and by then it starts to look a bit wilty. We've gotten grapes and oranges, both of which were delicious (though the seeds in the grapes threw Sitara for a loop), and we also bought strawberries which we thought were a bit lacking. Not really the climate for them I suppose.
So here we are, enjoying the beautiful seaside, the sand in Sitara's shorts and all over the apartment floor, and the great, amazing sun. It did rain at the beginning of the week, and seems to have cleared. I see the logistical rain also clearing soon as well, I hope.

Traveling...traveling....trave....zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Learning the true meaning of jet-lag (thus the reason the blog is three days late). Passed out at 3pm local Dublin time in this photo is my daughter who had been sleeping probably non-stop since arriving in Dublin, as well as both plane rides on the way. We are finally now in Malta after nearly a week's traveling.
I had tried to help prevent too much jet-lag by scheduling our flights spaced apart so that we could time our sleeping adjustments as we traveled half-way around the globe and nine time zones away from home.
I am not sure how much it truly helped as it still took a couple days of adjustment. It hit my daughter particularly hard, especially the first day in Dublin. For myself, I also dozed several times throughout the day the first day, and awoke (mostly due to Sitara's insistence that we get up) before sunrise. The second day, the day we spend out on the town was much improved, though we did both end up getting tired a bit before we should have, and stayed out longer than our bodies wanted to. Also some bus confusion and a very long walk across the city at the end wiped us out completely and we were in bed by seven. Arriving after 9pm local time in the apartment in Gozo didn't bother us though, and we were able to align ourselves with local time immediately due to our major time adjustment in Dublin.
Still, as our first trip abroad, I don't think we did too bad. I have traveled for days on end before without trouble, though it was all within a couple time zones. I was surprised how much the time zone changed really hit us, and wonder if it would be less if we traveled longitudinally instead.

Hello for Goodbye

With just over a week left before flying to our Maltese destination, Ts have been crossed and Is dotted in preparation for our time abroad. Now to bunker down and visit family and friends, most of which we haven't seen in nearly a year, and may not again for just as long. A complex process, visiting those we love and care about is, especially when gearing up for a long period away. Trying to schedule the time evenly, and also tracking down those we haven't seen since long before we left has been a challenge, but not the most difficult. It is the leaving, the saying hello so that we may say goodbye. Given, three months isn't really that long to me; it is that those three months are eternity for my daughter.

Taking care to see each loved one in their turn and still preserve the love of the journey she has gained has been difficult. Reminders of "home" and memories from the past have taken a toll on her willingness to leave and excitement for the adventure. The beloved toys at Papa's house, the pool in the backyard, great bear-hugs and cousins to play with all bring back a happiness that is very different from the thrill of travel. It is a sense of belonging. While I have taken for granted my own childhood filled with a certain sense of belonging with those I grew up around, her experience is that the next see she sees her loved ones they look different, and the places change ever so little; it can feel like home is passing by. Like the place she belongs to has less belonging than the people associated with that sense of belonging. Like looking in on a beloved snow globe, but not being able to step inside.

These are symptoms, or thoughts and feelings often described by and about kids who spend a portion of their developing years in cultures different than their home culture. These don't have to be extended periods even--just long enough to make an impact--three months at least. These kids are called TCKs, or Third Culture Kids. Being aware of potential problems, as well as the immense benefits to spending time living abroad, even for as little as three months has given parents an advantage on managing and overcoming this feeling of displacement. Doing a good amount of reading about experiences of kids abroad as well as families living in a continual shift from one country to another, I have been given a peek into their thoughts, feelings, and ideas for opportunities in development for both parents and kids. I hope this type of preparation, in combination with the preparation I have done in regard to culture shock awareness will help me become not only a better traveler, but also a better mother in the coming months and years. As a parent, I do plan on spending as much time abroad as we can for the immense benefits of cultural awareness, I am also aware of the importance of 'home', and hope to create an environment for her to have that, even if 'home' is not the traditional family setting in the suburbs.

Travel Quickening

When anxiety kicks in for various professionals, there are many techniques used in order to process the stress. Some do some deep breathing while counting backward; some exercise and "power up" for the coming performance or excitement; some vomit. Others, like myself, do. I don't just take a few deep breaths and know everything will be okay. I don't add caffeine to my diet (I have enough on a regular day) or increase my physical workload to compensate for my natural increase in adrenaline. What I tend to do is write lists upon lists of what needs to be done, and do them. Over, and over, and over again until I am sure everything is ready. I pace myself, as I have learned that getting "powered up" makes me forget, and deep breathing makes me sleep through my preparation time.

My daughter on the other hand, keeps herself busy with people. Her favorite thing to do is to socialize with friends and family, and neighbors she hardly sees. She likes to watch the kids in the park and eventually ask to play too. She takes her time, but loves to get involved, and generally stops many of her slower activities she regularly loves such as reading and playing chess. People who are closest to her become the most important thing on her plate: because she knows even at seven years old that those days to visit them pass, and physical distance becomes a pall for the coming season.

Together we have two weeks to prepare for the coming departure to a new, temporary home already set up for us, waiting with eager anticipation for the new occupants who will relish each chilly seaside moment, confused bus ride into the city, and accent translation mishaps.